Sorry, it's been a while since the last update. In the last few weeks we have taken our CPR/first aid class, filled out a ton of paperwork, and have been to 2 out of 4 weeks of classes. We go every Monday night from 4:30 till 10:00. It's not the most riviting 51/2 hours of our week but a necessary step to move forward with the process. There are a few things we have learned this past 2 weeks.
1. when angry, the kids can decide to poop in front of your bedroom door just to make a point. What is that point you ask???? I have no idea, but it has something to do with trying to get you to reject them. They think you are going to anyway, so why not get it over with. so sad.
2. no matter how mean, abusive, neglectful, and lame their parents were, the kids still want to be with them and you can't bash them infront of the kids. You must be nice when it comes to their bio-parents. That will be hard one.
3. It may take years....YEARS before our kids can say or even come close to showing that they love us. Ugh...that's tough.
There are many times when I sit back and think "What are we doing?" "Why are we purposefully doing this to our family?" "I am SO NOT qualified to handle this". And then, I look at Mike and he says something like, "Are we or are we not called to this"? Yes, we are and God promises to walk us through this. I have to admit, I have had times where I just wanted to not do it and keep our relatively easy life.....then, God whispers to me, that he loves His children and wants them to know Him and for us to take care of them. I am honored He thinks we can do this....I am honored He wants to entrust more of His precious little ones to me. I don't feel like I am a good enough mother, thank you Jesus, I don't have to do it alone. I have my family and I have you Lord.
A friend of mine always says "If He takes you to it, He'll take you through it". That means more to me right now than ever before.